Friends 'R' Family

char59 · Global Moderator

As I said before, Jessica was living in Davenport and working. She told me she was working at a McDonalds. I thought she said it was on one end of town and it turned out to be the other end. Dumb me!! There was no Mc Donalds on that end of town. Well, I was having my oil changed on September 20, 2002, so I thought I would look her up. When I couldn't find the McDonalds, I called her. She cleared things up for me. The last thing we said to each other was "I love you." I had to work that night. I worked n Clinton, Iowa at the time. That was 45 miles away.
At 2:30 am at home, there was a knock on the door. My husband answered the door. Here was a cop standing there. The cop came in, kept asking where I was. It took him about an 1/2 hour to tell my husband that there had been an accident. The accident occurred about 8:30 in the evening. Then he told my husband that both my daughter and grandson had died. When my husband told the cop I was in Clinton, he said he would call the Clinton police office and have a cop from there tell me what had happened. My husband said no. He and my son drove up there in the middle of the night and ran out of gas about a block from where I was working. Then, when I heard a knock on that door ( I worked in a private home), I wasn't real sure I should answer it. This family had some crazy family and neighbors. I did answer the door. When I saw them, I thought, "Oh they came to visit me" Then I thought, "It's 3:00 in the morning" I knew something was wrong, just didn't know what. My husband made me sit down. He told me, and I just started screaming. The parents of the little boy I was caring for came down stairs. Needless to say, I didn't stay at work. I called my boss to let her know. Then we went to my Moms.
I found out, that at first the cop went to my sister's house, because that was the only info they could find on where Jessica was living. My sister told the cop where I lived.
I found out that Jessica's husband was suppose to be coming to
Davenport to visit that day. He called her and told her that he wasn't coming. He was just joking, but she didn't know that. She left to go to Des Moines. On her way there, her husband saw her and called her. She got turned around and they met somewhere along the interstate. From what I understand, somehow Jessica lost control of her car, went into the mediun, the car broke in half, and the front part caught fire. It kept bouncing to the other side of the interstate. It hit another truck and injured that driver. I think my son-in-law was somehow responsible for this, even tho his car was not mentioned on the police report. His cousin was driving the car and they were both drinking. The cousin was arrested for drunk driving, but nothing to do with the accident. He went back to Mexico. I don't know where either one of them are to this day.
Well back to the accident. My son-in-law did say that he saw the accident and stopped. He went to the back part of the car when David was. He said David was alive at that point, but he was in very bad shape. They were taken to the local hospital. Nothing could be done for David. Jessica was burned so bad, I just pray that she died before she burnt. But I will never know. This occurred on a Friday night. When they got to the funeral home on Tuesday, the funeral director would not let me see them. I did get a lock of David's hair. My son-in-law said he wanted them in a blue casket. That was about the only thing my sister and I agreed on. She seemed to think she needed to take control of everything. I did get my way on most of the things. I think that made her mad, but oh well. I know I am kinda rambling and I am sorry about that. I am trying to keep things straight.
We did get to put them in the same casket. On their marker, I had a little ribbon that says "Mother and Son" My sister wanted the words "In God's Hands Forever" That was fine with me. We have spring flowers with a cocoon and on the other side, there are fall flowers with a butterfly. My cousin's husband is a minister. We asked him to do the service. We also had a Mexican minister that translated for my son-in-law. It was very nice. We had visitation about 1 hour before the service in the little chapel of the funeral home. We didn't think we would have very many people. It was mid week and mid day. Well, we had about 250 people and a lot of them stayed for the service. Talk about standing room only. My parents had previously purchased 3 plots. They gave one the Jessica. When it came time to pay for the grave, the cemetery charged so much to open the grave, then to bury them and close the grave. Then they wanted to charge extra, because there where 2 bodies!!! Get this, one hole, but they thought they needed more money Well when the funeral director heard this, he said to contact this local newspaper columnist. She is good at getting things done. Well she wrote an article about us. We got our money back.
I still have questions about the accident. Also a big question that I have is are they in that casket? I did not get to see them. I thought for a long time that someone was playing a very cruel joke on me, and that Jessica would come walking through the door. I still miss them so much and Fall is a bad time for me.
Again, I am sorry for rambling and jumping around on this. My thoughts are just so jumbled up about this.
I know that there is a reason that God needed them so early, I just don't know what it is. I know I titled this "The Final Chapter", and in a way it is. But there is a new chapter after this. I will write about that a little later.
Thanks so much for reading and for your support.
(((HUGS))) to all that read this.

nippercat · Global Moderator

Char, thank you so much for sharing this with us. I know it must have been so hard to write, and you were not rambling, Like me, it makes it a little easier if we write about something that is close to us. I'm so sorry for your loss, I never knew. And yes there has to be a reason why God wanted them earlier. Hopefully one day you will know what that reason is. For now, just take one day at a time, and know that we are here to support you and give you hugss whenever you need one. take care my friend..

ResidentInsomniac · Site Admin

Dear Char,

I am sitting here with tears in my eyes as I feel your anguish. It is always so difficult to lose a child and grandchild at the same time. Please know that your beloved Daughter and GrandSon are home with our Father.

We may not always know what the reason is, but, trust in God that He does a perfect plan for all of us. There will come the day when you will be reunited with your Daughter and GrandSon.

Never feel that you are rambling. This is the place where you are able to write your thoughts, feelings and memories. As Mary said, it does help to write things down to help to sort through the pain.

Always know that we are here for you if you ever need to talk.

char59 · Global Moderator

Mary and Lynne, I am sitting here at work, reading your replies and crying. I want you to know how much this means to me. Thank you for the shoulders and the hugs.
I am sending you bigs hugs back. Thanks so much.